Cooking in Limboland

I'm not sure which is worse - knowing that your marriage is over or wondering if it is.  There is no doubt that knowing things are over and watching the clock to see when a divorce can be finalized would be horrible (well, it would be horrible for someone who doesn't want his or her marriage to end).  However, wondering can be torture.  You wonder while you're "working on things" and then you have the pain of physical separation but you still have the wondering.  Hubby has accused me many times of (a) only doing as much as required to get what I want and (b) only making an effort when I feel that I can get what I want.  In other words, if I don't things thing will work out, then I stop trying.  I'm fatalistic.  Or so he says.

Well, here's my argument that he's full of crap.  Our house (as in, the marital home, to use lawyer speak) has a combination wall oven/microwave.  A really dumb idea.  Of course it came with the house and we didn't choose this stupid appliance but we're stuck with it nonetheless.  My hostility stems from the fact that if one component part breaks, you're likely stuck having to replace the whole damn thing.  And, as you've probably guessed, that's exactly what happened.  The weak link in this unit is the microwave and yep, the microwave just made a popping sound and promptly died.  No opportunity for CPR or a doctor's visit.  Just death.  Fortunately for Hubby, I was there when it happened so there can be no charge of sabotage but it's annoying nonetheless.

You may be asking, "He's in the house.  Isn't this Hubby's problem?" and you would be right.  However, I know that it would create big financial hardship off the bat ("Too bad.  Hubby made his bed and now he can lie in it no matter how cheap the sheets will have to be") and I'm trying not to be that much of a shrew.  Plus, it's still my house too (at least on paper) and - here's where I'm not being fatalistic - it may be my residence again as well.  (And he was saying this before the microwave's untimely demise - and he has no extrasensory abilities - so he can't just be saying that as a means of lessening the hit to his checkbook.)

This has prompted some joint shopping this weekend.  And, I can't believe I'm going to say this, there were moments when it was fun, pleasant and, dare I say, downright couple-like.  He even commented on the same thing so I wasn't imagining it.  Of course he was snappish and jackasslike this evening but I guess it's still something.